I have texted, I’m heading to the bank, when can I experience you?
I’ve texted, I love to HIV, instead of I love to give.
And when my frustration elevates into the danger zone, am I mad at myself? Of course not! I get mad at Auto correct! Duck you auto cucumber!
Auto correct is supposed to suggest corrections in spelling or grammar.
It isn’t there to finish our thoughts with words it thinks we want to use. We need to be in charge of it. Not it in charge of us.
But that means reading before sending. And based on texts I’ve sent and received, this doesn’t happen that often.
Take this text I received from my sister prior to meeting for lunch: In really pumpkin. Not here.
If you’re wondering what she was trying to say, you’re not alone.
This happens a lot. I receive a text and have no idea what she’s trying to say. I look at the keyboard, hoping to think of the letter she wanted to press but obviously didn’t.
It is close to Halloween, so the word pumpkin, well…maybe that’s a clue?
When all else fails, I simply text back, huh?
We are going on 10 minutes, and neither one of us has moved off the mark.
Realizing all bets are off, I try to mess with her a bit.
I text, bring your pumpkin…really.
Her response… Huh?
I text back LOL.
2 educated, college graduates going nowhere quickly and one of us is an English major.
I think your phone should be able to flash the word, huh? when necessary. Similar to when your computer asks you if you really want to delete something. It would be an alert of sorts that we are sounding dumber than dirt. A last chance to sound smart.
Not only are our phones making us sound dumb, they are also making us annoying, and dangerous. Today you practically need a helmet and certainly a lot of patience to walk from point A to point B.
How many times have you needed to bob and weave your way around the mall, the street, wherever you are, avoiding a collision with an oblivious person, head down and buried in their phone?
And there’s nothing more annoying than being behind a person who is walking and then simply decides to stop short! The pile-up of humanity behind them is akin to a pile-up of cars on the parkway, but without the broken glass.
Huh? How’d that happen, I’m sure they wonder.
I remember hearing about a woman in Miami who fell into an open cellar space because she was walking and texting. Forgive me but when I saw the video, I laughed. Out. Loud.
Huh? she must have said as she hit the floor.
Did you know that it’s illegal to cross a street in Honolulu if you’re texting? A city council member said, “this is really milestone legislation that sets the bar high for safety.”
My friends, we have melting glaciers, the threat of nuclear war, 300 million guns in the USA, and white supremacy rallies. Laws are needed to help us cross the street? Seriously?!
Before crossing the street LOOK BOTH WAYS LIKE YOUR MOTHER TAUGHT YOU WHEN YOU WERE TWO!
In the words of someone who wants to make America great again” …SAD.
Talk about the dumbing down of humanity.
So back to in really pumpkin not here.
Previously to receiving this text, and because I hadn’t read before sending, I texted my sister, are you interested in tight places?
When what I meant to text was, Are you in the right place?
She texted back in really pumpkin. not here.
What she meant to text was, in the right place. here now.
All together now my friends…. Huh?
— Tracy Buckner
Tracy Buckner writes for The Observer Tribune of Chester, N.J., and blogs for the New Jersey Hills family of newspapers, which serve Madison, Chatham and Chester, New Jersey. She enjoys writing about the slow decline and vows to go down kicking and screaming. You can read more of her musings on her blog: “Aging, Kids, Family and Why We Self-Medicate.”