I realized this morning what has happened to my memory. I have an intelligence leak. I’ve come to realize that every time I sneeze, I lose a little bit of my intelligence. I never thought I’d be one of those women who says, “Achoo…uh oh!” Yet here I am. I may need to buy a case of panty liners– otherwise known as intelligence catchers. Don’t even try to talk me into fancy, flowered underwear advertised on TV. […]
Essays and News
It may be true that everything comes out in the wash, but it’s also true that if you’re in a laundromat, you shouldn’t take off your bra in front of other customers before doing the wash.
That’s the valuable lesson I learned recently after the dryer conked out and my wife, who has never, to my knowledge, removed her brassiere in public, dispatched me to the laundromat to finish a load of wet clothes.
“You see everything in this place,” said manager Angel Lopez. […]
Any casual observer of my daily activities might accuse me of child-centered parenting, which Michael Mascolo, Ph.D., of Psychology Today defines as “parenting organized around the needs and interests of the child, rather than those of the parent.” Preposterous! My parenting isn’t organized at all. Also, as the only man of the house, I only do what I darn well please, except when I’m attending and providing transportation to every type of adolescent practice and performance known to humanity, […]
Erma Bombeck has two things in common with other legends of Art and Sports:
They make it look easy.
Let’s look at a few American Legends from the mid-twentieth century. Between 1951 and 1968, Mickey Mantle made slugging yet another homer out of the park seem like a breeze. Peggy Fleming, who started skating in Cleveland, executed her flawless figures on the rink through five US titles, three world titles and a gold medal at the 1968 Olympics like it was no sweat. […]
Are you ready for DST Monday?
We know it’s coming. It happens every year. We think we can prepare for it. We can’t.
Daylight Saving Time was invented to save energy. That may be true in the fossil fuel sense of the word, but it doesn’t save mom any energy.
This mom has the morning routine down to a science. But every March, just as the sunrise starts to sync with the alarm clock, “Spring Forward,” slams the morning routine into zombie mode as if to taunt me and say, […]